Balancing on a very fine line between anger and numbness.
Oh, anger would make everything so much easier... It really would! If I could hate him, think of him as a selfish pig who hurt me and laugh at his shortcomings, well. It would be easier. Breakups are always easier if one person is a total dick.
But as he's not it makes it more difficult. I find myself looking for reasons to be angry with him, and then pulling back like I've burnt my fingers on a hot stove.
Anger, I guess, won't give me anything in the long run. So screw it, I'll revert back to being numb, leave Edinburgh for the day and try to stay out of the rain (rain, rain, rain, I swear to God, someone in this country better be building an ark.)
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